Friday, April 30, 2010

The return of The Ramblings of an Unemployed-Bald-Fat-Man

Lying in bed last night I turned to my wife and said, "I really need a segway to help me walk the dogs." She laughed! I did not think this was funny because I was serious. Many of you know that I have a rough time walking since our accident several years ago. Recently my limp has had a serious effect on my back causing me extreme amounts of pain. I was thinking of a way to keep me mobile and functioning as a viable part of the ecosystem we call home. A segway would be perfect for me to tool down the street, three dogs in tow!

I vision it now, my wrap-around sunglasses, knee length shorts, helmet because we must be safe, and three excited yet extremely exercised dogs cruising oak street! What a sight to behold!

Then as if the ground itself was seized and pulled from beneath me, she uttered those words... Those words any middle-aged-fat-yet-unemployed-again-man shivers to hear. "If you can afford it, you can do it!" Oh the beauty of the sound a wifes voice makes as it reaches into a mans chest and pulls out the still beating heart! Then she stabbed it as it lie in her hand, "Not like insurance is gonna cover that!" The beating... stopped!

You see, I was at the doctors office earliar that very day and had a lengthy discussion about what insurance would or would not cover. For example: I am obese, I have diabetes, a mis-functioning pitutary glad, a colon resection, arthritus, femur implant, hip plate, knee problems, and now back problems, but the insurance company dictates to the doctors that a gastric bypass that would releave most of the symptoms and pain would not be covered by insurance. Neither would many more procedures and apperatice. (IE a swimming pool, I had to try.) So I could only imagine if they would consider a Segway a medical device.
So I rolled over and went to sleep dreaming of winning the lottery!

It's strange to say it, but yet theraputic, "I'm obese." Very few fat people just come out and say that. "I'm fluffy!" No big-boy you way past fluffy!

Obesity is a medical condition in which excess body fat has accumulated to the extent that it may have an adverse effect on health, leading to reduced life expectancy and/or increased health problems. EWWWW!

Then they throw that word on there MORBID: As Wikipedea says, Morbidity Obese increases the risk of many physical and mental conditions. These comorbidities are most commonly shown in metabolic syndrome,[2] a combination of medical disorders which includes: diabetes mellitus type 2, high blood pressure, high blood cholesterol, and high triglyceride levels.[28] Complications are either directly caused by obesity or indirectly related through mechanisms sharing a common cause such as a poor diet or a sedentary lifestyle. The strength of the link between obesity and specific conditions varies. One of the strongest is the link with type 2 diabetes. Excess body fat underlies 64% of cases of diabetes in men and 77% of cases in women.[29]
Health consequences fall into two broad categories: those attributable to the effects of increased fat mass (such as osteoarthritis, obstructive sleep apnea, social stigmatization) and those due to the increased number of fat cells (diabetes, cancer, cardiovascular disease, non-alcoholic fatty liver disease).[2][30] Increases in body fat alter the body's response to insulin, potentially leading to insulin resistance. Increased fat also creates a proinflammatory state,[31][32] and a prothrombotic state.[30][33]

All I know, I've been big and got bigger! BUT, how dare some insurance computer tell me, or yet a doctor, who has went to school, how to get better! I pay you insurance company, buck up and pay-out!

On a closing note, support an artist if you can. Buy a painting, a sculpture, a story, a candle, photograph, book or drawing. Starving artist make the world a better place.

The creative juices oil the hinges of this great planet. Without art the world would be so dull. Be creative also, we have become these robots that don't create anything! So as I dream of lottery tickets, segways and skinny jeans, Keep the faith!

No comments:

Post a Comment